Today, I want to talk about COMMITMENT.
I want to discuss the core element behind why some people can make changes in their life and actually stick with them, while others want to make changes but can only stick with it for days or weeks at a time before losing focus, energy or commitment to the goal they set.
I have conversations all the time with clients who “got off track with their diet and gained back the 10lbs” or “lost motivation to workout for a few weeks and need to get back into things” or “started building their online coaching business or program to help other people but got distracted with other things and haven’t worked on it in a month or so.
Have you ever wanted to make a change…made it… and then found yourself back to where you were before?
Yes! i’m sure we all have. even if it’s something small.
One of my goals at the beginning of the year was not to have any wine during the week. Who was I kidding, that totally didn’t stick.
When we want any change to stick we have to ask ourselves a few things:
Is this really important for our survival or happiness?
If we don’t make this change will there be consequences we don’t want to deal with?
What is the worst thing that will happen if we don’t stick to making this change?
Honestly, if we don’t have a definite YES for these questions, what’s going to keep us committed to making the change?
I don’t have an alcohol problem, meaning a glass of wine during the week is not damaging to my health, my work, my relationships.
If I have a glass of wine during the week I’m not going to die , my husband isn’t going to divorce me, and I’m not going to lose my job.
The worst thing that will happen is that i’ll be disappointed in myself for not sticking to my plan and ya know what…that’s easy to get over. Letting yourself down is way easier than letting someone else down.
It’s the same thing when people have goals not to eat any chocolate or not miss a workout or meditate everyday, drink more water, stop criticizing themselves in front of the mirror, etc.
If you don’t make this change will there be consequences you don’t want to deal with. Will you lose a friend, get a divorce, lose your job if you have some chocolate or criticize yourself in the mirror?
What is the worst thing that will happen if you don’t make this change? you’ll let yourself down right? You won’t get closer to your fitness goals?
You might even get further from those goals?
But is it really important for your survival or happiness? Will you go into a depression or have a heart attack if you miss a workout?
Think about it. When was a time in your life when you made a big change in your life and you stuck with it?
What forced you to make that change and why did you stick with it?
It must have been really important to you.
Something happened that sparked the need to change and stay committed.
I found myself this year waking up in the middle of the night with a super tight lower back and legs. I wasn’t sleeping through the night and was in a ton of discomfort. This was happening because I was sitting more at my desk during the day and my hamstrings, hipflexors, and lower back were getting tighter.
So I changed my workout routine and added two days of yoga a week plus extra stretching after my workouts.
I didn’t want PAIN, DISCOMFORT, and WAKING UP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. These were consequences I didn’t want to have if I didn’t get my yoga and stretching in. So I stay committed.
I started foam rolling once a week because when I’d run, my IT band would give me pain. If I didn’t foam roll, I’d get pain or wouldn’t be able to run. Consequences…PAIN in my knee and not being able to run!
The consequences for me were much worse than the changes I needed to make.
When someone isn’t going to the bathroom and they are having GI pains and cramps, you bet your bottom dollar they are going to commit to doing what’s necessary to heal their GI issues.
But 3 months earlier when there weren’t any symptoms, they might pass on the recommendations to do a cleanse for gut health or start eating more fibrous foods.
The reason I bring this up is because unless you decide to CREATE the urgency or the NECESSITY for the changes you want in your life, you simply won’t stay committed.
Fortunately, most of us don’t have life threatening illnesses or diseases that require us to change our health immediately or we’ll die. But if we don’t have severe consequences for our actions or inactions, what will force us to commit and stick with it?
There are a few ways to make change necessary in our lives even when it’s not life threatening or painful. because as you know, people are making them everyday!
People are changing their habits, losing weight and keeping it off.
People are changing everyday behaviors to live healthier and more vibrant lives and they aren’t going back to old unhealthy ways.
People are changing careers and starting new businesses even though it would be easier to stay at their old job.
I’ll share 1 very important way we “create this necessity for change” and stay committed to what we start.
If you do this, you will have a much better chance at sicking with whatever changes you want to make.
So how do we create this necessity for change.
You have to look at the change you want to make and truly IDENTIFY with it.
I consider myself a wine lover, so naturally I didn’t truly IDENTIFY with not drinking wine….However, I do IDENTIFY with having a pain free body. I will not be the kind of person who lives in pain or gives up on her activities because of injuries that can be prevented. I truly embody a person that values her physical abilities, strength and function.
If you think about a goal or change you want to make, are you fully IDENTIFYING with it? Does it align with who you are as a person, your core values, what you are about, how you want to be remembered, how you role model for others? It must!
If you can’t seem to drink more water during the day then you haven’t Identified with being a person who values hydration, energy and healthy brain function. You don’t embody being a person who carries a water bottle around, has a glass full on their desk, offers water to others at all times. You have to become this person in order to make the change. Or it simply will not stick for you.
Change is hard my friends.
There is no doubt about it.
The first step is changing how we IDENTIFY with the changes we want to make.
Outside of health and fitness goals, I mentor many women who have business and career goals!
Women that want to start a business or create programs because it sounds fun, exciting, fullfilling, or they think they have a great idea and see the potential for financial gains or the ability to quite their full time job.
But these changes are just as tough as any health and fitness changes if not tougher!
Creating a business or program takes a great deal of time, planning and commitment. When the work gets hard and the customers don’t come rolling in, what’s the necessity to stick with it and stay committed?
You must IDENTIFY with being a successful business owner, being a leader, mentor, coach. You must possess the core values of a person who does not quite when things get hard. Who fights through struggle and evolves with new demands. Identify as a person who can and will succeed, no question. Embody your role as a business owner who knows business is hard, it takes time and hard work to be successful.
If you do this, there is a greater chance that you will be the person you want and strive to be. Someone who doesn’t quit, someone who fights hard and evolves, someone who believes in themself.
Take a moment right now to think about a change you want to make in your life or a goal you have for yourself and ask yourself, is that a part of me, my values and my beliefs? Can I make that a part of my identity so that I can commit and succeed?
When it comes to living a sexy and confident life I fully IDENTIFY with that. It’s me to the core, ask my friends and family.
If I was to meet your friends and family would they say that you are a person who believes in living a healthy life, who values strength and confidence to thrive in personal and professional achievements.
If you have goals to be healthy, strong and confident then you MUST embody it, believe in it and role model it. Otherwise, it’s just another wish or want that gets buried by your excuses.
Make this year different by choosing to IDENTIFY with the best of who you want to be. Don’t just wish it, will it.
When I created my SCWF I knew that I wouldn’t truly help women make permanent lifestyle changes unless they changed their identity. They had to change how they saw themselves, how they identified with being strong, healthy and confident. Wanting this lifestyle is different than embodying it and making it a part of who you are as a person.
With each of the 21 different lessons I teach in the formula, you gain more and more commitment to the goals you have for your life because you are making choices about who you want to be as a person, how you want to role model for your kids, what you value most.
The formula will enlighten your perspective and mindset for living into the best of who you want to be.
If you are sick and tired of breaking your commitments and falling off track each time you set a new goal, it’s time to take a new approach.
Let me give you the formula that helps you get to the core of who you are as a woman.
IDENTIFY with the best of who you want to be. What does that look like?
Design a lifestyle that aligns with your core values.
It’s your time, let’s do it together.
This will be an exploration of your thoughts, habits and behaviors that will give you the power to make permanent lifestyle changes and become the sexy confident woman you are meant to be.
Start with something simple, like my 3 Steps to Unstoppable Training below! CLICK HERE