It Starts With Willpower But Ends Without Clarity…
Results.
It’s the one thing we want when we start the next fitness program, or jump into the next diet craze. We leap into these new things, hoping they will be the one thing that changes our habits and behaviors giving us the results we’re looking for.
But here’s the thing:
I created the Sexy Confident Woman Formula because I believe we need to build the foundation of our lives before we work towards the surface level solutions. Those solutions help us get the desired results, but they don’t help with sustainability.
Willpower vs. Clarity
If you remember my last blog, I mentioned that it’s important to have beliefs. We can know what to do, but it isn’t until we believe why we’re doing it that we really make the right choice.
Let’s take that a step further.
Let’s talk about the power that we have – our willpower – and why it’s not always enough.
Think about when you try a new fitness program or jump into the latest diet fad.
Although you’re thinking, “Oh, this is so painful,” your willpower helps you get through it, for the most part.
For the first couple weeks, you dig it out and charge through…
Until eventually it becomes a losing battle.
That’s because we’re not clear on why we’re doing it in the first place.
If we’re not clear on who we are, who we want to be, how we want our lives to grow, it’s truly difficult to sustain the results we achieve.
I’m not just talking about the short term – “I want to lose 5 pounds.”
I’m talking about your life – the long term. The every day for the next five to ten years. You show your kids how to do it. It’s a lifestyle.
This is your life. This is your time.
Believe that.
When we forget to go for what really matters – the belief and clarity – all we’re doing is trimming the weeds.
The weeds are those bad habits, those bad behaviors. We know we shouldn’t do something, we know it’s not good for us, but we do it anyway.
Because those weeds grow in our lives and then we chop them down with a fitness or diet program, but then they grow back and we chop them down again.
It’s like a roller coaster ride where our bad habits just keep coming up.
“What the hell? I was doing so good. But I’ve eaten like crap for the last two weeks and haven’t done a workout. I have no motivation and I don’t feel good.”
Sound familiar?
Of course it does. You’ve been there. You know what it’s like.
It’s because you’re not pulling the roots of those overgrown weeds.
Do you have a garden? How annoying is it when the weeds just keep coming back?
It’s because you’re just trimming the weeds instead of getting down on your hands and knees and pulling those weeds from the roots. You don’t want them to come back, right?
It starts with belief and then continues with clarity.
Before I was a high performance coach, more of a life coach, I didn’t think much about clarity. I wasn’t diving into what it is that I value most in my life.
Who do I want to be?
Where do I want to take myself?
What’s really important to me?
Having clarity in those areas will dictate your success.
It’s no longer up to your willpower.
You don’t want to leave the decision-making power up to willpower anyway, you’ll lose that eventually.
Instead, we want to build the foundation, those values, and the clear vision of where we want to take our life.
Let’s dig into that.
What do you value most in your life?
Of course you want to look good. You want to feel good. But, what if tomorrow was your last day on Earth, what would you do? What would you spend time doing? I don’t think it would be eating a box of Oreos.
Do you value your family most? Do you value the time that you get to spend with them?
Yes, family is going to be a big factor.
When you think about what you value most in your life.
And you have to ask yourself is my health, my energy, my focus being limited by what I’m doing in my life?
When it comes to health, we want to live a healthy lifestyle for more than just vanity reasons.
Yes, health is a means for living your life.
Everyone always says, “I want to lose weight, Anna, because I just want to look and feel better.”
But is that the real reason?
Maybe you want to have a more intimate, healthy relationship with your husband or boyfriend.
Maybe you want more energy and more strength to play with your children.
It’s not really all about vanity when you think about what you really value in your life.
If you really value time with your kids and your family, or you want a stronger relationship with your spouse or boyfriend, it’s really about more.
So much more!
Why do we make decisions to be healthy, exercise, and eat well?
We want more energy. We want to feel better.
We want to give more love because we love ourselves more.
We can be more intimate because we have more energy.
It’s hard to be more intimate with our relationships if we’re dragging and struggling to get up because we binged on a ton of chocolate the night before. Or if we’re bloated because we overate or overdrank and the next day you don’t want to play with your kids.
You don’t have the patience.
Your work suffers.
What do you value most in your life? Write it down.
You make better choices when you decide “I really value these certain things in my life. I’m crystal clear on what I want, what I want my life to be like.”
Everyone wants to look sexy, but why?
Because you can make more out of your relationships and have more energy for the things that you love.
Do you feel clear about who you are?
Do you feel clear about who you are as a person and what you want and what’s important to you?
If you could describe yourself in three words, who are you?
I love asking this question.
In Module Two in my HPC course, and in the Sexy Confident Woman Formula, we dive deep into this – personal identity – because it really matters how you identify yourself, who you really want to be.
Maybe right now you don’t feel like your best. Maybe you’re thinking, “I feel lazy, I feel unmotivated, and I feel distracted and struggling.”
But that’s not the best of who you are.
Who is the best of you?
Who is that woman who is really ready to be her best and reach her greatest potential?
Are you clear about who that is?
If you’re really looking at her, it’s not just about the pounds. You’re so much more than just numbers on a scale.
I hope you believe that, because I believe that about you, and I don’t even know most of you personally.
If you know who you want to be, are you living in alignment with that person?
I look at my life and look at myself, and if I’m dragging I know I’m not living in alignment with the best of Anna. The best of Anna is way better than this, so I need to change my decisions, change some habits, or I need to add new habits into my life.
I know when I get really frustrated, impatient, or even overwhelmed that I’m not living in alignment in some way. I need to get back to those habits that make me feel more at peace, more clear, more focused. For me, those habits are meditation and journaling. Those things make me feel most alive, focused, and energized.
I think about recent habits that may have led to those feelings.
Maybe I’ve been slacking. Maybe I’ve been drinking too much wine.
This is when we have to think about who’s the best of me? Who do I want to be? Am I clear on who I am? Am I living in alignment with that woman?
Have clarity.
When you think, “I just don’t feel like working out,” your willpower kicks in and says, “You can do it.”
Easy, right?
But if you’re clear about it, you realize you need to workout because what’s most important to you is your energy for my family, my kids, my job, my career, and myself.
That is when you’re living in alignment with the best of who you are.
I want you to take some time to become clear on some of these things that you may not have thought about before.
Do some journaling. Write down what you value most in life. What’s most important to you. What are those three words you would use to describe the best you, and are you living in alignment with that?
If not, what can you do to change that?
Get clear and stop relying on your willpower to push you through your workouts and eating healthier meals.
Dig at those roots, have belief in what you’re doing and have clarity on what’s important in your life.
And that is when your success will skyrocket.
Start digging!
